Ft Wainwright Soldier Guide Workshop 12/3/2024
I did not know how much I needed this. Getting to open up like that with the guys I serve with would never have happened without Summit. Now I have a connection with all the guys that were there that I would have otherwise never gotten to know. I’m grateful for that!
___
It was way different for me this time than last time. I think I was in a different place. I thought about some things in my story that I didn't think about last time. I don't think I shared a lot about just how restorative this last year was for me, because I was in a different place. God was restoring me in ways that I was kind of in the midst of last time, and now I'm at the other end of it. I feel like I'm a lot more emotionally healthy now, more stable emotionally. I've gotten really close to this unit. That was new for me, and I see that as a picture of health. I feel closer to God than I was before. He's no further to me than He has been. But to feel that He has remembered me has been good. That's what I prayed last year, “Lord, remember me.” I didn't feel like He had, but He has.
___
Last time I was so locked up and clammed up. I didn't want to talk about anything. I didn't want to open up any of these doors because I didn't want to walk into them. A lot of things happened. I didn't want to think about it. I was trying to keep very stoic and boxed in. Keep people out, and not let anyone in. Like, that's my problem, not yours. It was really tough last time. I was shaking and crying while I was sharing. But this time I didn't cry. It didn't have as much of a hold on me at all. I was able to open up more since the last time. I was able to open some more of those doors. I was allowing myself to feel and allowing myself to go there. I was able to not let my past have as much hold over me and cripple me like before. I could dig into why I act like I do, what tendencies I have now. Maybe it’s because of some of the stuff that I've done and been through in the past. Being able to let myself feel, to actually have feelings, was something that I've been working on a lot. It's been really, really helpful. I don't like it, but I need it. And I like not having pain every time I try to think about it now. So that was really helpful. Very freeing for me from last time to this time was not letting that have as much control over me.
___
A lot has changed since the last time I was here. I just kind of kept all the stuff from my past boxed in and to myself. I didn't want anyone to know about it. I didn't really feel comfortable saying it. But after getting it off my chest, it felt great. I felt more comfortable expressing my story to new guys in our group last night. It was hard, but it felt great to get stuff off my chest. I liked hearing the new guys stories and their hardships and learning from it. I hope just next time the guys that are here right now can come back as group leaders and tell their stories so they can learn.
___
I think it's always good to hear other people's stories because it helps with realizing that you're not the only one. Before, my biggest problem was thinking God hated me. But it's good to know that other people go through stuff too. Hearing other people's stories helps bring closure. This time it was a lot easier for me to talk about things and be more sympathetic.
___
The difference between last time and this time was night and day. I learned lessons the first time that I didn’t immediately apply. Last time went fast, but this time we went slower. Sharing my story last night gave me the tools and know how. I spent the last six months learning and getting more comfortable sharing my story. I’ve been thinking more back on it, how my story has affected me and changed me as a person. It just gave me the toolset to come here and be able to actually talk to people and be comfortable sharing every aspect of how I've come to be.
___
I definitely knew what to expect from last time. Last time around I kept my story pretty short and to the point. This time around I give a little bit more information in my story. I feel like I was able to be more receptive this time to other people's stories because I had those building blocks from last time.
___
Last time I had just gotten to the unit. When they had us in the groups that were company based, I still didn't know the people in my group. It was crazy for me to see what these people who basically put up a face had been dealing with so much stuff in their lives. I see these people in the barracks all the time and they seem perfectly fine, but they've gone through their fair share of trouble in life.
___
I didn't really know what to think. I didn't know what we were going to be doing. I've never really liked to open up about myself. I'm always afraid people are going to use it against me. It was nice to be able to just talk and tell my story without any scrutiny. I met some cool people here that I didn't know before.
___
I had to mature at a very early age because I had to take care of my mom since I was seven. I’m always the one hearing others stories, just listening for somebody else. I’ve never really actually shared my story. People will come to me and tell me stuff's going on in their life. They just talk to me about it and I'll just be there listening. So, it was a nice change being on the side where I was the one telling my story. It felt uncomfortable, but it was nice.
___
I thought we were only going to be talking about the Bible in circle and all that. I was like trying to find my way back to Christianity. But this was all different. I didn't think I had to open myself more. I try to keep it to myself and not talk about me because I don't know what people are going to think. I’ve never be good at working with my emotions. I was only experienced listening to people. But people listened to me and I could see their story and connect with others. Everything was nice.
___
Where I'm from, we always just grow apart. Being here and being able to share my feelings and experiences was an eye opener. Most of the people I see around the barracks, and I just never talk to them because that was just how I raised. We don't share names. I was more of a quiet person, so being able to come here and just open up and talk helped me a lot.
___
My mom was a single mom, so she always had to have her guard up. We never saw her be vulnerable or cry. If there was something wrong, we would just joke it off. So that's how it was like my whole life. But coming here and lately, I think God has been taking me to a place of vulnerability and being okay to talk about things and let emotions out.
___
I came on this trip here to get around the guys. To kind of let some emotions out, let some feelings out, get to know everybody a little deeper than I did before I came here, and get a better understanding of everybody. So, I appreciate coming.
___
This was new for me. I have never opened up like I did here. I liked it, you know, it was all right. Not what I thought it would be. I’m not a guy that really shares his story and to actually share it and have people care to listen to it was pretty nice. I’ll definitely do it again.
___
It felt pretty good to open up with some things from my past and some of the things I'm still working through. I was raised to just take it like a man and bottle it up. It was good to get it out.
___
I grew up going through a lot of therapy. I couldn't express myself; I didn't know how to. I’ve always been taught to keep your head up, don't look down, move on, do what you have to do. Just keep growing as best you can. Something like this was never something that I did. So, it felt good to finally release it and actually be able to talk about stuff that happened to me. This was a good experience.
___
I honestly didn't know what to expect. I kind of had an idea but I wasn’t 100% sure. I don't really talk about my past to others, unless someone asks. This was a new experience.
___
I don’t talk about my feelings. Nobody does. Instead, if I need somebody to talk to, I just talk to myself or my mom. I'm really surprised how easy it is for people to talk about their feelings in a group gathering. There are a lot of people that are alike here. I laughed for the first time.
___
I've known some of these guys quite a while. They were some of the guys that I met when I first got here. Just to hear them, talk to them, and hear even more of their story was an eye opener. Me being a barracks manager means I talk to pretty much everyone, but hearing their stories is definitely an eye opener. Hearing their story and actually knowing where they come from and what happened in their life was pretty cool. We are all Soldiers. We’re always here for each other one way or another.
___
I wasn't expecting this. My mom knows I don’t like to talk about my feelings, so she would make me go to church. She thought that was going to help me open up. It never did. Instead, I would always make others tell me how they feel. I would talk to them and their situations. But what I was missing was even though I could help people open up, I couldn't help myself. I recently lost my aunt, the only person I could talk to when I joined the Army. That completely closed me up to being able to talk to people. Being able to talk yesterday helped open up some doors. So, it was good. I hope that God helps me continue being able to share.
___
This was a nice experience. Most people here know my mom is a single parent, and I was the only kid at the time, so she was always my number one. She's a person I can talk to. Letting those guys into my past last night was a good feeling. We all have these similar issues we can relate to. That gives me more confidence to open up myself to those guys and build off those experiences. This whole experience was something that I needed because I’m not in a very good place. I have stuff that's going on back home and that's going on here too. It's up to you to make things better for yourself. So that's a part that I'm trying to take for myself. I just appreciate everyone who came and opened up told their stories. Thank you for that.
___
It was nice because I've been working through stuff the past couple years. It’s nice to see that I'm able to share freely without having emotional baggage. It felt a little too easy at some points, which is a good indicator that I've been actually working through stuff. I think this is a lot better medium to share with people. I've gone through therapy and it didn't really have much of an effect on me. I think this overall is a lot more effective.
___
It was nice to come with a couple guys from my platoon that I thought I knew pretty well. I knew a lot of the major things, but it's kind of nice getting to know smaller details that might help us work together and get along better.
___
It was really awkward for me because I really don't remember. I kind of block all of my past memories
because a lot of stuff happened. I had to think back and try to say some things. I didn't say a lot but I just didn't want to remember. I didn't know how to react emotionally and I was thankful for everybody for listening and not judging. That was nice.
___
I wasn't expecting this, to be honest. When I heard about a Chaplain's retreat, I didn’t know what I thought it was going to be like. But it was nice to enter a room, small group, and get to know each other. To get to know other people's difficulties growing up gives a whole new perspective in life. I will say this too. I shared more last night than I shared with anyone in my life. It was a nice opportunity that we had.
___
This was nice to do. It was nice to open up about what I've been through and hear about what other people have been through. To know that I can relate to them about stuff makes me feel like I'm more connected to the guys. I can relate to them. I can feel more comfortable around them, making working easier together. I felt weird being here, like maybe I had some more stuff that I've been through than other people. But now I can relate. I feel a lot better around these guys, a lot more comfortable. So, it was nice to learn.
___
It was definitely nice to open up because I haven't ever really done so. It was definitely nice to be able to get those emotions out.
___
I learned that I was not a person who liked to talk about my past, believing that no one else would understand me or judge me. But I saw that there are people who go through the same experience or even worse. At first, I was thinking that I was going to only have a religious experience, but it was both religious and establishing connections with other people.
___
Everyone has their own story and most of us have things from our past that keep us chained up and confined in one narrative. We have to learn how to forgive the people we have wronged and those that wronged us we have to forgive. God is love and forgiving. He forgives those who forgive others.
___
Going again for the second time allowed me to get more comfortable in sharing my story since the first time I went. It allowed me to think more about every experience I went through and how that made me as a person. God heals and knowing He’s in my story as a guiding force and praying for Him to heal and guide others helped the group greatly. This was another kickstart to my self-development journey.
___
I learned that I needed to come out of my shell and open up a little and try not to be so distant with people in life.
___
I learned that my past is my past and I don’t need to let it affect my life now. And that people will understand my story and not judge.
___
I learned that if I need to open up, I can actually open to people and don’t have to be the one receiving story all the time and giving feedback. It’ll definitely change me, since I learned how to open up to others. I can share my story with others who come to me for help and let them know how bad it was for me too, instead of just listening.
___
It is always encouraging to see how God is suddenly moving in the lives of Soldiers. This is the second Summit guide training for our battalion, and it is continuing to grow. I foresee two more Soldier lead groups making a total of four in our battalion.
___
It was way different for me this time than last time. I think I was in a different place. I thought about some things in my story that I didn't think about last time. I don't think I shared a lot about just how restorative this last year was for me, because I was in a different place. God was restoring me in ways that I was kind of in the midst of last time, and now I'm at the other end of it. I feel like I'm a lot more emotionally healthy now, more stable emotionally. I've gotten really close to this unit. That was new for me, and I see that as a picture of health. I feel closer to God than I was before. He's no further to me than He has been. But to feel that He has remembered me has been good. That's what I prayed last year, “Lord, remember me.” I didn't feel like He had, but He has.
___
Last time I was so locked up and clammed up. I didn't want to talk about anything. I didn't want to open up any of these doors because I didn't want to walk into them. A lot of things happened. I didn't want to think about it. I was trying to keep very stoic and boxed in. Keep people out, and not let anyone in. Like, that's my problem, not yours. It was really tough last time. I was shaking and crying while I was sharing. But this time I didn't cry. It didn't have as much of a hold on me at all. I was able to open up more since the last time. I was able to open some more of those doors. I was allowing myself to feel and allowing myself to go there. I was able to not let my past have as much hold over me and cripple me like before. I could dig into why I act like I do, what tendencies I have now. Maybe it’s because of some of the stuff that I've done and been through in the past. Being able to let myself feel, to actually have feelings, was something that I've been working on a lot. It's been really, really helpful. I don't like it, but I need it. And I like not having pain every time I try to think about it now. So that was really helpful. Very freeing for me from last time to this time was not letting that have as much control over me.
___
A lot has changed since the last time I was here. I just kind of kept all the stuff from my past boxed in and to myself. I didn't want anyone to know about it. I didn't really feel comfortable saying it. But after getting it off my chest, it felt great. I felt more comfortable expressing my story to new guys in our group last night. It was hard, but it felt great to get stuff off my chest. I liked hearing the new guys stories and their hardships and learning from it. I hope just next time the guys that are here right now can come back as group leaders and tell their stories so they can learn.
___
I think it's always good to hear other people's stories because it helps with realizing that you're not the only one. Before, my biggest problem was thinking God hated me. But it's good to know that other people go through stuff too. Hearing other people's stories helps bring closure. This time it was a lot easier for me to talk about things and be more sympathetic.
___
The difference between last time and this time was night and day. I learned lessons the first time that I didn’t immediately apply. Last time went fast, but this time we went slower. Sharing my story last night gave me the tools and know how. I spent the last six months learning and getting more comfortable sharing my story. I’ve been thinking more back on it, how my story has affected me and changed me as a person. It just gave me the toolset to come here and be able to actually talk to people and be comfortable sharing every aspect of how I've come to be.
___
I definitely knew what to expect from last time. Last time around I kept my story pretty short and to the point. This time around I give a little bit more information in my story. I feel like I was able to be more receptive this time to other people's stories because I had those building blocks from last time.
___
Last time I had just gotten to the unit. When they had us in the groups that were company based, I still didn't know the people in my group. It was crazy for me to see what these people who basically put up a face had been dealing with so much stuff in their lives. I see these people in the barracks all the time and they seem perfectly fine, but they've gone through their fair share of trouble in life.
___
I didn't really know what to think. I didn't know what we were going to be doing. I've never really liked to open up about myself. I'm always afraid people are going to use it against me. It was nice to be able to just talk and tell my story without any scrutiny. I met some cool people here that I didn't know before.
___
I had to mature at a very early age because I had to take care of my mom since I was seven. I’m always the one hearing others stories, just listening for somebody else. I’ve never really actually shared my story. People will come to me and tell me stuff's going on in their life. They just talk to me about it and I'll just be there listening. So, it was a nice change being on the side where I was the one telling my story. It felt uncomfortable, but it was nice.
___
I thought we were only going to be talking about the Bible in circle and all that. I was like trying to find my way back to Christianity. But this was all different. I didn't think I had to open myself more. I try to keep it to myself and not talk about me because I don't know what people are going to think. I’ve never be good at working with my emotions. I was only experienced listening to people. But people listened to me and I could see their story and connect with others. Everything was nice.
___
Where I'm from, we always just grow apart. Being here and being able to share my feelings and experiences was an eye opener. Most of the people I see around the barracks, and I just never talk to them because that was just how I raised. We don't share names. I was more of a quiet person, so being able to come here and just open up and talk helped me a lot.
___
My mom was a single mom, so she always had to have her guard up. We never saw her be vulnerable or cry. If there was something wrong, we would just joke it off. So that's how it was like my whole life. But coming here and lately, I think God has been taking me to a place of vulnerability and being okay to talk about things and let emotions out.
___
I came on this trip here to get around the guys. To kind of let some emotions out, let some feelings out, get to know everybody a little deeper than I did before I came here, and get a better understanding of everybody. So, I appreciate coming.
___
This was new for me. I have never opened up like I did here. I liked it, you know, it was all right. Not what I thought it would be. I’m not a guy that really shares his story and to actually share it and have people care to listen to it was pretty nice. I’ll definitely do it again.
___
It felt pretty good to open up with some things from my past and some of the things I'm still working through. I was raised to just take it like a man and bottle it up. It was good to get it out.
___
I grew up going through a lot of therapy. I couldn't express myself; I didn't know how to. I’ve always been taught to keep your head up, don't look down, move on, do what you have to do. Just keep growing as best you can. Something like this was never something that I did. So, it felt good to finally release it and actually be able to talk about stuff that happened to me. This was a good experience.
___
I honestly didn't know what to expect. I kind of had an idea but I wasn’t 100% sure. I don't really talk about my past to others, unless someone asks. This was a new experience.
___
I don’t talk about my feelings. Nobody does. Instead, if I need somebody to talk to, I just talk to myself or my mom. I'm really surprised how easy it is for people to talk about their feelings in a group gathering. There are a lot of people that are alike here. I laughed for the first time.
___
I've known some of these guys quite a while. They were some of the guys that I met when I first got here. Just to hear them, talk to them, and hear even more of their story was an eye opener. Me being a barracks manager means I talk to pretty much everyone, but hearing their stories is definitely an eye opener. Hearing their story and actually knowing where they come from and what happened in their life was pretty cool. We are all Soldiers. We’re always here for each other one way or another.
___
I wasn't expecting this. My mom knows I don’t like to talk about my feelings, so she would make me go to church. She thought that was going to help me open up. It never did. Instead, I would always make others tell me how they feel. I would talk to them and their situations. But what I was missing was even though I could help people open up, I couldn't help myself. I recently lost my aunt, the only person I could talk to when I joined the Army. That completely closed me up to being able to talk to people. Being able to talk yesterday helped open up some doors. So, it was good. I hope that God helps me continue being able to share.
___
This was a nice experience. Most people here know my mom is a single parent, and I was the only kid at the time, so she was always my number one. She's a person I can talk to. Letting those guys into my past last night was a good feeling. We all have these similar issues we can relate to. That gives me more confidence to open up myself to those guys and build off those experiences. This whole experience was something that I needed because I’m not in a very good place. I have stuff that's going on back home and that's going on here too. It's up to you to make things better for yourself. So that's a part that I'm trying to take for myself. I just appreciate everyone who came and opened up told their stories. Thank you for that.
___
It was nice because I've been working through stuff the past couple years. It’s nice to see that I'm able to share freely without having emotional baggage. It felt a little too easy at some points, which is a good indicator that I've been actually working through stuff. I think this is a lot better medium to share with people. I've gone through therapy and it didn't really have much of an effect on me. I think this overall is a lot more effective.
___
It was nice to come with a couple guys from my platoon that I thought I knew pretty well. I knew a lot of the major things, but it's kind of nice getting to know smaller details that might help us work together and get along better.
___
It was really awkward for me because I really don't remember. I kind of block all of my past memories
because a lot of stuff happened. I had to think back and try to say some things. I didn't say a lot but I just didn't want to remember. I didn't know how to react emotionally and I was thankful for everybody for listening and not judging. That was nice.
___
I wasn't expecting this, to be honest. When I heard about a Chaplain's retreat, I didn’t know what I thought it was going to be like. But it was nice to enter a room, small group, and get to know each other. To get to know other people's difficulties growing up gives a whole new perspective in life. I will say this too. I shared more last night than I shared with anyone in my life. It was a nice opportunity that we had.
___
This was nice to do. It was nice to open up about what I've been through and hear about what other people have been through. To know that I can relate to them about stuff makes me feel like I'm more connected to the guys. I can relate to them. I can feel more comfortable around them, making working easier together. I felt weird being here, like maybe I had some more stuff that I've been through than other people. But now I can relate. I feel a lot better around these guys, a lot more comfortable. So, it was nice to learn.
___
It was definitely nice to open up because I haven't ever really done so. It was definitely nice to be able to get those emotions out.
___
I learned that I was not a person who liked to talk about my past, believing that no one else would understand me or judge me. But I saw that there are people who go through the same experience or even worse. At first, I was thinking that I was going to only have a religious experience, but it was both religious and establishing connections with other people.
___
Everyone has their own story and most of us have things from our past that keep us chained up and confined in one narrative. We have to learn how to forgive the people we have wronged and those that wronged us we have to forgive. God is love and forgiving. He forgives those who forgive others.
___
Going again for the second time allowed me to get more comfortable in sharing my story since the first time I went. It allowed me to think more about every experience I went through and how that made me as a person. God heals and knowing He’s in my story as a guiding force and praying for Him to heal and guide others helped the group greatly. This was another kickstart to my self-development journey.
___
I learned that I needed to come out of my shell and open up a little and try not to be so distant with people in life.
___
I learned that my past is my past and I don’t need to let it affect my life now. And that people will understand my story and not judge.
___
I learned that if I need to open up, I can actually open to people and don’t have to be the one receiving story all the time and giving feedback. It’ll definitely change me, since I learned how to open up to others. I can share my story with others who come to me for help and let them know how bad it was for me too, instead of just listening.
___
It is always encouraging to see how God is suddenly moving in the lives of Soldiers. This is the second Summit guide training for our battalion, and it is continuing to grow. I foresee two more Soldier lead groups making a total of four in our battalion.